[A little time curled up on Ferdinand is a miracle for emotional regulation, imagine that.]
I think maybe that's also a little bit of timelines confusing things. It was less Byleth and more... well... I think the people from my timeline have seen sort of the furthest extreme of where his Kingliness can go with his determination. In the worst possible way and I'm so glad he's not there anymore, not here at least. But it's... a bit of a different perspective?
Which isn't fair to our Dimitri, you're right. One more thing to add to the list.
I didn't think it was fair to ask your forgiveness when I had hurt you like that. That's why I didn't (and still don't) feel like I could apologize. It doesn't mean anything if it's only words and not actions.
That's something I should keep in better mind. I can only imagine what he would have done if we didn't stick by him. More importantly, if the Professor wasn't there with him. The Professor is the kind of person who can bring out the best in people, despite all odds.
His Highness had a lot to work through. He still does, I think, but he has a chance to heal more here even if this place can muddle things up. Still, he is the kind of man who wants to do well by others. Those who need protection, those who need help. If not for him and the Professor, I'd always wondered if I'd have been at Ailell along with Sir Gwendal. What a mess that would have been, I bet.
Anyway. I understand what you're saying, but I still would have appreciated it at the time. However, I also won't rush you. This should be at your pace, and I can meet you there with that.
Everyone keeps talking about taking some time to heal here. It's hard not to focus on the "what if"s though. Is it really worth it if it's just going to get you killed when we inevitably go home?
You being at Ailell with Gwendal was definitely a mess. I'm just glad you listened to Teach.
If you think the worst about those "what ifs", then you aren't going to find the things worth celebrating. Most of us have been through the worst of it. Why not build something good out of it? There's no war here. We can make the best out of that.
I suppose if I were to listen to anyone, it would've been the Professor.
If you go looking for nothing but darkest shadows, you're never going to find the sun. All I had once was focusing on the things I could do. The things I could get through to survive, and think about what made me happy.
It's hard. I know it is. But if I didn't, I'd... well, I'd probably be no better than any bandit we've ever killed.
There have been a lot of times where planning for the absolute worst case scenario is the only reason I made it through something alive... it's really hard not to plan for the worst, even if I do hope things come out better than that.
I'm not saying don't be prepared. I'm saying that you can also look forward to certain things. Bernadetta's smile, a good meal, tea with a friend. Even just simple things like that can be enough to keep someone going.
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I think maybe that's also a little bit of timelines confusing things. It was less Byleth and more... well... I think the people from my timeline have seen sort of the furthest extreme of where his Kingliness can go with his determination. In the worst possible way and I'm so glad he's not there anymore, not here at least. But it's... a bit of a different perspective?
Which isn't fair to our Dimitri, you're right. One more thing to add to the list.
I didn't think it was fair to ask your forgiveness when I had hurt you like that. That's why I didn't (and still don't) feel like I could apologize. It doesn't mean anything if it's only words and not actions.
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His Highness had a lot to work through. He still does, I think, but he has a chance to heal more here even if this place can muddle things up. Still, he is the kind of man who wants to do well by others. Those who need protection, those who need help. If not for him and the Professor, I'd always wondered if I'd have been at Ailell along with Sir Gwendal. What a mess that would have been, I bet.
Anyway. I understand what you're saying, but I still would have appreciated it at the time. However, I also won't rush you. This should be at your pace, and I can meet you there with that.
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You being at Ailell with Gwendal was definitely a mess. I'm just glad you listened to Teach.
Thank you.
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I suppose if I were to listen to anyone, it would've been the Professor.
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[That's it. That's all he can bring himself to say. Like... the very idea goes against everything he is.]
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It's hard. I know it is. But if I didn't, I'd... well, I'd probably be no better than any bandit we've ever killed.
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But think about what I said, okay? The little things, they really do build up into a good foundation.
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